Today marks 10 years since my Dad died of Motor Neurone Disease. This photo was taken at the Hoover Dam 12 years ago, just a few months after he was diagnosed. We jumped on a plane, hired a car, and did a road trip across The States. This trip created some of the most beautiful family memories before his health began to rapidly decline. What a gift it was to be able to have this moment.
His diagnosis wasn’t just an opportunity for us to go on an awesome adventure, but it was the absolute catalyst for me completely re-working my life. The three years that followed this photo were an absolute mess, but I can’t help but feel gratitude for the journey it took me on and the lessons I learned along the way.
I was in a destructive relationship, I was building a career in something that I thought I wanted but was totally misaligned with, I was super compliant and uptight, controlling, self absorbed and completely masking my own issues with no willingness for personal growth or improvement. I didn’t even realise how miserable and messed up my life had become, because I didn’t know life could be any different.
About a year or so before this photo, I’d discovered yoga. At that time it was just a physical practice, the laziest way my friend and I could think of to get ‘fit’. After my Dad’s diagnosis, I started to resonate with some of the yogic teachings that my instructor would bring into the class, that I’d previously ignored or made fun of with my friend. It started to expand my mind a little. Around this time I’d also met a guy through work who was a tarot reader, he gave me a reading. He told me that my then partner wasn’t right for me, and that I’d meet two further men. One who wouldn’t work out but would still be a good friend, and one who’d be my forever partner. I didn’t give it much further thought, but after those three turbulent years following this photo, it turns out he was absolutely spot on. This was when I truly discovered the power of tarot.
Through this guy and through my yoga practice, I made many further connections in the spiritual community. Each new person led me further away from my miserable life and further towards my greatest potential. And without my Dad’s diagnosis, I don’t know if I would have ever been in the mindset to be open to any of this stuff. I’d probably still be stuck in my miserable career and would have settled for that unhealthy relationship, because on some unconscious level, that’s what I would have believed I deserved.
So when I look at this photo, I can only smile and thank my Dad for the soul agreement that he and I made together before we entered this lifetime, because he clearly had a lot to teach me, and I clearly had a lot to learn. And from his higher perspective, he made the ultimate sacrifice to ensure I course-corrected my life towards my greatest potential.
Thank you Dad