I was sick with stress: How I got through the worst period in my business’ history.

Recently, things came to a head. I was incredibly close to full closure of my business. The summer is always tough for wellbeing businesses, but things didn’t pick up in September like they usually do, either. It was a rough month, both financially and emotionally. But I had my retreat weekend to keep me focused and look forward to.

It was an incredible weekend, as always. But the moment I returned home, not only did I receive some unexpected news about the future of my retreats, but I also had to find £600 out my arse to cover the rent on the wellbeing centre. I’d exhausted all of my savings and was absolutely down and out. I’d finally come to the conclusion that this was it. I’d have no choice but to shut up shop and call it a day.

We’ve cut back on all personal luxuries, and have just been living to pay bills and eat. I was broken beyond measure, physically trembling with stress and ended up having a full meltdown the day after returning home from Devon.

I was also kicking myself for turning down that job I’d been offered. I felt an absolute fool.

But then I remembered…

🙏🏻 It’s okay to feel this way. It’s important to feel the feelings and sit with them for a while.

🙏🏻 My business is actually making money. Sure, it might not be a lot, but at least it’s not in the red. Just that realisation changed my energy and the energy I was projecting onto my business.

🙏🏻 I’m better off than I realise. I have a roof over my head, food to eat and a safe life. I have a lot to be grateful for.

🙏🏻 Everything is temporary. My business has been through so much. This may be the closest I’ve been to giving up, but I’ve got through stuff before and I’ll get through it again.

🙏🏻 I turned down that job for a reason. It just wasn’t viable to fit into my life. I’d have burned out. Then I’d have been no use to anybody and likely worse off financially.

🙏🏻 I LOVE what I do. I can’t imagine a world where I don’t do this. I’ve worked so damn hard to follow this dream. To give it all up would break me in unimaginable ways. Even when I win the lottery (yes, “when” 😉), I’ll still come back to work tomorrow. This is how I know I’m in the right place doing the right thing.

These realisations have lifted my energetic vibration and things are showing signs of improvement. I’m not out of the woods yet, but progress is progress, and I’m certainly feeling significantly lighter about things.

Thank you all for all your love and support over the past couple of months. It’s been a real blessing and gives me a much needed reminder to keep showing up.

“Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming…” 🐠