Seven year cycles: How everything has changed over the last two weeks.

I’m not going to lie…I’ve been a mess! The last two weeks have been incredibly heavy for me. I’ve felt exhausted, anxious, frustrated, unbearably stressed, deeply sad and disappointed in both society and myself, as I sat in the energy of “I can’t do this anymore!”

I was ready to chuck in the towel! I had made the decision to wind down my business and take a job 😱 “Stick a fork in me, I’m done!”

The whole time wondering “WTF is happening?!?!” I’ve known so many people going through similar experiences and feelings lately. People who usually have their shit together. People who I look towards for guidance and grounded advice. All of us, completely done in. What’s going on? Is it a coincidence, or something more than that? Something energetic, perhaps? A collective consciousness. Or even something within the stars?

Whatever is going on, I haven’t enjoyed it one bit. It’s been the darkest I’ve felt for some years.

Then, as I reached my seven year business anniversary last week, it occurred to me that things work in seven year cycles. And let’s face it, the last seven years of my business have been an absolute shit show! So maybe now, finally…I’m stepping into a new cycle. New energy for my business. I finally feel like I might have an actual chance of real success. Like it’s all been leading to this ‘make or break’ moment.

It all came to a head this weekend. The universe gave me an ultimatum. I was due to start a new job this morning. I’d decided it was time to grow up and re-join the rat race. A client of mine had recently said to me “This business is like a toxic relationship. You put all your love and effort into it, and keep hoping it will change. But will it ever change? Or will you just keep breaking yourself trying?” Now, you might think that’s a bit of a harsh view, but she wasn’t being unkind at all. It was a very healthy conversation and a really valid viewpoint. Have I just been barking up the wrong tree for the last seven years?

Admitting that this may be the case really did cut deep. And deciding to accept a job made me feel all kinds of ways. Mostly ashamed and like a complete failure.

But then something weirdly magical happened. I was asked to enter in my shifts for the next month. As I was putting these into the system, it became abundantly clear that this job wasn’t even a real possibility, without completely giving up my business. In just doing the bare minimum at the wellbeing centre, I’d still end up working 6-7 days a week. At one point I was looking at a 14 day stint with no time off. It just wasn’t feasible. And that reality was like a glowing light of sunshine beaming down upon me. The absolute ultimatum I needed…

Give up on my business and surrender to everything I hate about the world and have resisted so hard for the last seven years, or go all-in, hell for leather, guns blazing with absolutely no option for failure. And given it’s the start of a new seven year cycle, I binned off the job and opted for option two!

So here I am…with a new energy and a new plan. With absolutely no other option but to make this a success. Because what I do is far too important to give up. It’s far bigger than me. The LV Life Wellbeing Centre is a safe space within this increasingly terrifying world. It’s peoples’ dose of essential self-care. It’s a healthy escape and a place of solace and restoration. It’s a community hub for the weird, the wonderful and the woo woo. And the thought of giving it up felt like an absolute non-negotiable. It filled my heart with heaviness.

What a gift this experience has been. It’s reminded me of what truly lights me up. Something that I’ve been struggling to connect with for some time now. It’s given me back my purpose, my passion and my place in the world. I love what I do, I’d just somehow forgotten amongst all the noise and fear, but only temporarily 😉

Now, here I am. Going nowhere. Committing to this beautiful business that I’ve worked my arse off for over the last seven years. Bringing it into a new cycle, a better cycle, a cycle of growth, abundance and success. Here’s to the next seven years. I’m totally here for it!